"The 20s who were brilliant with Big Bang...""I felt so guilty". "Hold on with blank music...Everything is my karma".
Actor Top (real name Choi Seung-hyun, 38) from the group Big Bang has announced his retirement and plans for future activities.
The Netflix series "Squid Game Season 2" features a fierce battle between Ki-hoon (Lee Jung-jae), who returns to participate in the game after vowing revenge, and frontman (Lee Byung-hun), who greets him. It has reached 152.5 million viewers so far, three weeks after its release on the 26th of last month, making it the third most-watched production of Netflix after "Squid Game" and "Wend's Day."
Top was sentenced to October 2016 in prison and suspended for two years for smoking cannabis at home. After withdrawing from Big Bang, he hinted at retirement, saying, "I'm not making a comeback in Korea." However, he joined 'Squid Game' Season 2 and was at the center of controversy by signaling his return.
Top once became a rapper in "Squid Game 2," but he played Thanos, who was discarded after investing in a cryptocurrency recommended by YouTuber Lee Myung-ki (Temporary Wan). After its release, it was well received overseas, but in Korea, the poor acting skills of the tower were criticized.
Top, who had previously announced his retirement, said in an interview on the 15th, "I was careless. In my 20s, I had a beautiful time with such brilliant and undeserved love, but the dark time I encountered by making a big mistake was a path I had never seen. "I spent a hell of a dark time in it, and I was psychologically impoverished at that time, I had a lot of self-loathing, and I felt guilty of disappointing and hurting my loved ones, family, and fans," he said.
"In my devastated mind, I was so broken at the time that I didn't have the strength to get up again and I wanted to quit everything. That's why it was like that on a live broadcast. I was stupid and rash in that part, and I think it's something I have to reflect on for the rest of my life," he said.
In addition, "When I was in my 20s, I was loved by Big Bang and enjoyed a lot of glory, so I think there are many people who are disappointed and hurt. I regret it deeply and I think I should reflect on it for the rest of my life," he said again.
He also said, "My heart was so heavy and I have a hard time damaging others, but it's my fault that I ruined the team's image with mistakes committed by a person named me in the Big Bang team, and I always have to live with my heart's debt."
As for Big Bang, he said, "Big Bang remains a beautiful memory in his 20s, but I thought I should be the one who made a big mistake and caused damage to the team, and I should call up social service personnel and endure the criticism alone. I said I'd leave because I couldn't damage the team because my sins weren't erased. Five years later, I was offered to do a project for the song Spring, Summer, Fall and Winter at the end of the contract, and I thought the project itself was my last project as a big bang for everyone."
The reason why I can't go back is shameful, he said, adding, "I don't keep in touch with the members often these days. I saw the comeback stage and it was cool. "I'm just rooting for the members," he said.
When asked about the hiatus, Top said, "I blocked my social life, and when I hurt many people with guilt and self-loathing and hurt my parents so much that I was devastated by self-loathing, I lived only at home and at the music studio. The reason why I was in the music studio was that I was able to breathe. I could only get out of the dark when I made music. So I made music. There is no exact timing yet, but I have plans to release my music soon."
As for future plans for activities, "Nothing has been specifically decided yet. First of all, it is the first step in 11 years to meet and talk with reporters. I thought that a person named me, who received a positive response from overseas, would be forgiven first in Korea. There was no long window, so we couldn't talk and there was no justification. The rash appearance through SNS spread misunderstanding and caused a sense of betrayal and hurt. My karma," he said. "I wanted to talk honestly with a not-so-easy heart, and I deeply regret my rash appearance, which has been very dark. I'll show you a good side of me and a living side of me," he said.
[YANG SO YOUNG, reporter of "Star Today"]
